We All Know The Difference Between Right And Wrong, But Every Child Needs Fine-Tuning“My child has no respect for authority. He is rebellious and violent.”
Start to inculcate values in your children as early as possible.
Does this sound familiar? With a little soul-searching, parents facing such a problem may find that their kids are short on the right life values – and that they are responsible. Begin when your child is able to understand speech. However, starting late is better than doing nothing at all.
Oh, and by the way – values, which give direction and guidance through life are not the same as virtues. Virtues, which are NOT a result of good genes or ‘caught’ by chance, are strong character traits that also need nurturing from childhood. Parents need to inculcate both in their children with consistency, sensitivity, patience, and a great deal of love.Teaching Honesty
Your child must know that lies beget distrust. As a rule kids, don’t lie unless they’ve been punished for telling the truth. Over-strict parents with unreasonable demands implant fear in a child’s mind that lead to lying, cheating and ‘blame-shifting’.
When a child accidentally breaks something or is otherwise clumsy, we often throw a fit and/or punish them. Encouragement to be more careful and instructions in how to hold an object are better alternatives (of course, they must also mop up the mess).
We must not make our children feel guilty. Once a child begins to lie out of fear, it becomes a habit. They will grow up inhibited, lacking confidence and moral courage.
Teaching Respect For Self And Others
When we show respect to elders and those who work for us, our children will follow suit. We must also desist from criticizing teachers and others in authority, at least in front of our kids.
Do you respect your child for who he is? Do you listen to him and consider his feelings? If you do, he will learn to respect himself too. Allow him to be different within the bounds of the rules laid down. You don’t have to praise him all the time- nor withhold criticism when he deserves it. However, it is important to focus on the deed, not on the child. Don’t berate him in public or boast about his talents.
Respect begets tolerance. We need to help our children learn to accept criticism and to respect others’ points of view. If they disagree, we should give them a chance to discuss it later, but explain firmly that everyone is entitled to an opinion. This will help our children to become tolerant of others who do not share their beliefs as adults.
On politeness – when people in the house say ‘thank you’, ‘please’ and ‘sorry’ to each other, regardless of age, manners come naturally to children.
Teaching Generosity And Social Responsibility
Being generous to those in need fosters the excellent virtue of empathy. Your child is constantly exposed to inequalities in society- why not encourage them to set aside a part of their pocket money for charity, and to give their old books, toys and clothes to an orphanage?
Do show your appreciation when they part with something they hold dear. Encourage participation in school visits to orphanages and schools of the physically or mentally challenged. We cannot protect our children from the realities of the world, and doing so would not help them to learn compassion.
Teaching Sharing, Team Spirit And Fair Play
When organizing an event, allocate duties and emphasize that teamwork spells success. Encourage your child to take up team sports. Besides cooperation, sport teaches them to be gracious winners and a good loser, and that winning is consequential.
Buy one toy for siblings to encourage the spirit of sharing between them, and handle issues between them impartially. Also, explain to them the decisions you take, to teach them to base their judgments on evidence and not prejudice.
Teaching Courage, Responsibility And Perseverance
Trust your child with small responsibilities to teach him to work independently. Appreciate hard work, patience and perseverance.
Teaching Kids About Money
Do give your children an allowance, but also a piggy bank. They need to embrace the concept of saving for the future, and of wise spending. Your child must be able to distinguish wants from needs, and will learn this concept quickly when his or her own money is involved. Later, open a bank account for your child. Encourage goals – saving towards that long desired cricket bat, for instance.
Teaching Green Values
Teach children to cherish the planet and its creatures.
• Visit the zoo, keep a pet and watch TV channels like Animal Planet and NGC together.
• Insist that they turn off water taps while brushing teeth and switch off the lights when not in the room.
• Teach them not to litter.
• Visit botanical gardens, grow your own plants and exercise conservation ideals in your outdoor activities.
Once you have equipped children with values, you can trust that they will base their judgments on them. Then be assured that they will evolve into self-possessed, successful adults.
Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring and integrity, they think of you. ~ H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Copyright © Jean Isaacs
This article may be reproduced with due credit to the author and a live link back to http://www.lovingyourchild.com
Additional resources:
- Inspirational Kids Stories: Stories For Kids With A Moral – Teach your kids life’s values through the stories of this ebook. Contains messages guaranteed to nurture and inspire your children, from being kind to animals to ‘don’t talk to strangers’ and loving your parents.
- Inspired Children – Weekly step-by-step guide to teaching essential life skills to children aged 4-14 yrs in just 15 minutes at a time. Topics include: self esteem, communication, nutrition, exercise, cleanliness. Perfect for Parents, Teachers, Grandparents.
- Inspired Parenting – Go DEEP INTO the EXACT practices and techniques that parents can use to help children and teenagers overcome challenges, find their purpose and live a happy, THRIVING life.
Posted by Kids Are Special in BEHAVIOR
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